Fit – something I’ve never been, but something that had to become a priority. Here’s why.
Earlier this year, I decided I was going to try and sort my health out a bit. This wasn’t any kind of ‘weight-loss journey’ waffle, it was legit concern about my health.
For this, we need to travel back a couple of years. Small-Me was about 2 and I was skinny as a rake. I mean, 8 stone of skinny. Now, I’ve never in my life been a slim bird.
Prior to having Small-Me, I was a solid size 12-14 and 100% not bothered about it, whatsoever. As a short woman, that size wasn’t especially flattering on me, but I’ve never been the type of person to take notice of that stuff in any way shape or form.
I was happy enough, and really, the more of me, the better, right?
Anyhow, I got bigger during pregnancy, as you do, and then once I had my little girl, that didn’t change that drastically. But then, strangely, something unexpected happened. After a while, I started to drop in size. And again, and again, until one day I realised I’d skinnied-out at around 8stone 9oz.
This was completely unheard of for me, but what made me more concerned is that I wasn’t actually trying to lose weight. In fact, I was on a robust menu of three Chinese takeaways a week, the odd Pizza thrown in for good measure and not much else in between.
I went to the doctors (obviously thinking I was dying of Googlematosis) and everything seemed to be alright, other than the fact I was bonier than Skeletor’s sack.
I was also extremely tired, which isn’t actually unusual for me (more on that later), but I realised that although I was suddenly slim, I now felt incredibly unhealthy.
Ironically, this was around the time that people started to compliment me on how good I looked…or that I’d ‘disappeared’. Now, I know a lot of people crave that shit, but such feedback made me feel extremely uncomfortable – and before anyone starts piping up with ‘shut up Ar, wish I had that problem’, you can go right ahead and clam up, because you’d feel exactly the same if someone turned around to you and chirped up with ‘Oh my God, you’ve BALLOONED! You look so big now!’
Increasingly frustrated, I began to ask around if anyone knew any sensible ways of putting on weight or building up strength. People just didn’t get it, and all I got was a lot of eye-rolling and comments about not knowing how lucky I was. Screw you, bitches at toddler group.
There’s nothing lucky about waking yourself up in the night because you’ve rolled onto your own actual pelvis and thought you’d been stabbed in the pants by your own bones, trust me.
It really surprised me how much focus there was on weight loss, and almost none on strength building and healthy weight gain for slim women. I realised that this was something I was going to have to try and work out for myself.
So, after months of eating unadulterated crap in a bid to try and get back up to a healthy size, I realised that I had to start going about this properly.
So, I tentatively began researching ways to get my body strong, healthy and fit again, with a surprising outcome. In my next post I’ll explain more, but I’d love to know how you’ve ever approached getting fit, and if you’ve ever had any experiences like mine.
Leave me a comment below or you can Tweet me @actual_ar.
Writer, tweeter and illustrator. Starving artist and thrifting expert. Pen for hire and first-time author at work.